Sunday, September 7, 2014

Big Brother 16's Frankie Grande is not the Anti-Christ

It pains me to have to write a blog post that is in any way supportive of Frankie J. "Look at me, notice me" Grande.  His "I'm Ariana Grande's brother so worship me" schtick was old about thirty seconds into it and the preening 31-year-old has worn out his welcome on my and many millions of TV screens.  He's self-absorbed, narcissistic, delusional, and catty.  But he's not Satan, he's not a contender for Keith Olberman's "Worst Person Ever," and he's not deserving of the explosively negative reaction now taking over the Big Brother 16 Twitter timelines.

Here's the story.  As any fan of this season knows, Frankie is not just a dancer/former Broadway performer, YouTuber, and Famous Adjacent Dude*, he's also a philanthropist.  He is part of two different charities doing work in Africa - Broadway in South Africa and Build On.  Despite what his detractors want to think, both are legitimate charities and both have raised money to help people in disadvantaged countries.  Whether you think the money is spent wisely, or whether there are more "deserving" charities, there is no dispute that they are real, raise money, and try and do some good. 

Before one of Frankie's trips to South Africa, he apparently posted the following about his experience at the airport as he tried to catch his flight.  As anyone who has ever flown knows, getting through the airport can be frustrating to say the least.  You have to maneuver through a maze of check points, avoiding squalling children and pieces of luggage larger than a water buffalo, strip down to your undies hoping to retrieve all of the belongings you jettisoned to make it through security only to find your plane has changed gates, has mechanical problems, or was rerouted to Guam.  With that backdrop, Frankie wrote the following:



I read that as funny and relatable.  Frankie has a way of describing things that is actually pretty funny.  And the juxtaposition of going off to do charity work while simultaneously bitching about all the little people who stand between him and the plane is hysterical. In my family, we have one rule - anything for humor.  The question is not, should you say that, but was it funny.  Life is too short not to laugh, not to find the humor in every situation, whenever you can.  There is so much serious crap going on all the time (not to mention, spoiler alert, we're all going to die some day) why not take the chances to smile, chuckle or laugh out loud every chance you get.

As a formerly fat, currently Jewish person, I was not at all offended by anything he said in that post.  It was exaggeration of an experience for humorous effect - basically the very definition of humor.  What was important to me was - it was well-written and funny.  It was not mean-spirited or hateful (unlike much of the vitriol currently being hurled at Frankie).

Frankie was taking his time to go and do something to benefit someone else.  Did he do it solely for "selfless reasons?"  Of course not. No one does.  Mother Teresa and Gandhi were supremely selfish people - they served others because they wanted to, they felt compelled to and BECAUSE IT MADE THEM FEEL GOOD.  This notion that charity has to be done "unselfishly" is ridiculous.  Giving makes people feel good, helping others gives one purpose.  Anyone who gives of themselves for another is helping - and it is not for anyone else to judge whether one charity is more deserving of another or one do-gooder is superior to another.

I know that Big Brother creates heroes and villains and Frankie is this year's villain (personally, I am much more disturbed by the Gaslighting that Derrick has done to the young people in the house than anything Frankie has done). As an avowed Zach Rance fan, I hated Frankie for backstabbing Zach as much as the rest of  you.  But right now I'm much angrier at all the hatred he is getting for this funny if somewhat tasteless post and the fact that it forced me to do something I never thought I'd do.  I had to write something in support of Frankie J. Grande.  Oh, Rose!


*coined by https://twitter.com/LunaCee73 

14 comments:

  1. Thank you. The world needs more people like you.

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    1. Wow! I am sure your family and friends are proud of you as much as you should be of yourself. You are wise, fair, eloquent in your writing. I have been discouraged lately because i have been such a fan of BB for many years but saddened by the hatred for Frankie. The funny thing is I am not really a fan of his but feel such sympathy for him when he gets out in the real world. I think what saddened me most was browsing through his instagram and shocked at what hatred is coming from all ages comments. Amazed at adults attacking 10-12 year olds for defending frankie. I finally felt hope when i read a comment from a 12 year old boy who said such vile things said about frankie is not warranted and if people cannot stand that frankie is gay then don't follow him on his twitter and instagram. Granted technology is great with so many available outlets to express one's opinion but when the hated is so bad towards one individual it makes me wonder if there is something deeper going on. Thanks for your article it made my night.

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    2. Thank you so much for your comment, it made my day!! ;)

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  2. Another very well written piece. While I don't think I've been overly hateful, publicly at least, you're much more charitable toward him than I can bring myself to be, so I have to respect you for that.

    And it cracks me up that "Famous Adjacent Dude" has taken on a life of its own.

    Luna

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  3. eh for someone to go to south Africa to help with charity work he certainly was considerate enough to not forget his expensive clothes *snerk*,by no means I am saying he should wear cut up clothes.but including that in your blog when you are going somewhere to help people you should have bit of modesty and humbleness knowing how hard it is there for the people living there.

    now if for you being funny negates the seriousness of the charity work he is going to do then at least for me i cant accept it i would rather have someone being serious and respect the whole trip than taking things this lightly,while you might say its relate able he should suck it up and write about the good things he had experienced and keep a positive outlook sorry i enjoy humor but seeing him on feeds and reading this rubs me the wrong way.

    I dont wish for bad things to happen to him,certainly wouldn't scream " I will kill you" (cause thats what good-hearted humen beings do) if i see Frankie walking down the street.but I hope frankie gets bit of negative reaction to have a grasp of reality and understand that showing compassion and humbleness are far more superior than being entertaining.(I agree though on that the people wishing ill things to fall upon him are not any better than Frankie)

    oh one last note for those 12-13 year olds who will see me as a total jealous filled person i honestly wouldn't mind if he wins and i respect that he does great things for people from charity to entertain his fans.but i think there are things about frankie that rubbed people the wrong way and where there is smoke there is fir.so you can show your love for his actions and defend him all you want but that doesn't mean i have to like him too sorry.

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  4. great insight, glad someone can finally see both sides.

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  5. Very well said! I agree wholeheartedly. So many things are taken out of context these days and it is nice to see someone, who is in the "dislike" category of Frankie writing something that makes so much sense. Words like "I'll kill you", "I'll slit your throat", using "theatrical terminology" & mocking others in some way/shape/form are common these days, and does NOT mean that is exactly your intent. We are ALL made fun of for whatever reason at some point unfortunately, but how you perceive it is up to you. Hating on others for words is just a waste of time & energy in my book.

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    1. lol common? in jail maybe? thats not how 31 year old grown up talk nor behave. yes people take things out of context but projecting those words over and over means isn't normal specially when the reaction it get by people leans more to being disgusted rather than amused.

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  6. While I don't like Frankie in any shape or form. I do appreciate your level headed interpretation of his persona. There are a lot of sarcastic dry people similar to Frankie that he can be comparable to. He is being taken to an entire new level of examination, due to his own choice. Conversely I would love to see an article from you with a deeper investigation/analization of Derricks game. "I am much more disturbed by the Gaslighting that Derrick has done to the young girls in the house" His treatment/gameplay(?) with the women in the house disturbed me more than anything Frankie has done. And is no where near the level of who he is being compared to (Wil & Dan) as they were not trained in psychological manipulation as Derrick is.

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  7. While I respect what you wrote, and the fact that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, I do hope that people realize that not all dislike of Frankie is based on the blog he wrote. I can only speak for myself in saying that reading that blog did not change my opinion of him in the least. My dislike of him is based solely on what I have seen and heard as a live feeder. So honestly, I was rather surprised it wasn't even worse after seeing him on the feeds.

    There have been quite a few things said this season that have made me cringe and that I did not like, but I also realize that this is a game...it has happened every season and will continue into the future. This game almost guarantees that there will be manipulation and deceit, and part of the reason I watch is for the drama that inspires. I also realize that none of us know how we would react in that situation or what we might say.

    That being said however, all of these people signed up for a television show and they are fully aware it is being broadcast live 24/7. While there are few of the contestants that haven't said things that they will probably regret, none of them have sunk to the level that Frankie has. As an already semi-public figure he, more than any of the rest of them, should have been aware of the consequences of his words and actions.

    I can not remember ever being as disgusted by anyone that has been on Big Brother as I have been by Frankie J Grande. Just when I think he could not possibly say anything I would be more offended by, he says something that shows me yes, in fact, he can.

    So, while I am not one of he people constantly tweeting negative things about Frankie, I do understand the animosity that he has created. There is an old saying that goes something along these lines..If you dance to the music, you have to be willing to pay the piper. When Frankie goes back into the real world again it will be time for him to deal with the repercussions of his actions and while I wish him no harm, he has no one else to blame but himself. However that being said, he does not deserve anything to happen to him that physically harms him in any way and anyone that wishes that I am offended by as much as I am offended by him.

    I realize that I could have simply stopped watching the feeds and would not have had to listen to what he has said. But I paid to watch the Big Brother live feeds, not the Frankie J Grande show, so why should I have to turn them off in order to avoid being subjected to the many disgusting things he has said. I do all I can to avoid conversations he is involved in unless they are game related, and switch cameras when he appears but, due to his need to constantly be the center of attention, he makes it virtually impossible to not hear the comments that spew from his mouth.

    Frankie does have one thing to be thankful for..CBS did not air the vilest of his comments so there is a percentage of the viewing audience that has not seen the worst side of him. So as negative as people's reactions may be, they could be much worse because not everyone is aware of just how low he sank during his time on Big Brother.

    I, for one, will be so grateful when the day comes that I do not ever have to see or listen to Frankie again. If there is an All Star season in the future, I truly hope that CBS has the good taste and respects the viewing public enough to not subject us to him ever again.

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    1. This^^^ Applause.Sadly, it looks like CBS etc see him as an extension to his sister's zombie's and his own tween minions. He'll probably be all over my favorite CBS reality shows, and I will unceremoniously bid them goodbye.

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    2. For all I care, Frankie can go do whatever he wants, wherever he wants, exploiting his sister's celebrity, as long as we aren't subjected to his behavior anymore on television. (Rape jokes, ridiculous comments on lesbian sexuality, groping men consistently, a poor representative of the LGBT community, rewriting history even outside the game, etc.)
      What is truly the shame here is that someone as genuine and caring as Zach Rance, as demonstrated on the feeds (search Youtube), appears to be fiercely loyal and stuck like glue to FAD, and will likely not see the feeds in entirety to make up his own mind on the completely personal and non-game related insults Frankie had to say about him behind his back. Very unfortunate.

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  8. if the comments in house that were said by frankie were ever said to his sister he would probably hire a hitman to take him out. glad to see that little boy leave the BB house and wish the audience wasnt filled with CBS staffers so they will boo him right out the studio door

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