If there is a lesson to be learned from tonight's Survivor episode it is that we never really leave junior high school. Jimmy T and Marty resented Coach Jimmy's confidence, his ability to get people to follow him, and his aura of celebrity. Rather than being glad they were given a natural leader to help coalesce the team and direct them as a united front, they were envious. Both are alpha males, both wanted to be the popular ones, both wanted the light to shine on them. So the only contestant on the show referred to by both a first and last name had to go. Bye-bye Jimmy Johnson, we'll see you behind the big desk this weekend, neatly shaved, professional coiffed, and still in possession of your self-respect.
Still at Survivor retirement camp, we'll have Marty, so clueless and arrogant that he thinks he can control an ER doctor, and Jimmy T, who fashions himself a leader because once he hooks a fish he manages to reel it into his boat. Dude, fish don't have thumbs, they can't take the hook out! It's a little one-sided. Anyhow, once these two realize that only one can be the new Coach, I see another power struggle on the immediate horizon. Meanwhile Dr. Jill is perfecting the Sandra Diaz, game-winning "anybody-but-me" strategy and Holly miraculously survives another tribal vote after flipping out only a couple days earlier. And Yve is making the rest of us oldsters feel really bad about ourselves. Stop looking so hot, this isn't Cougar Town!
Over on the young people's team there is a fractured tribe, split into two camps -- we'll call them likable and the digging their own grave ones. In the likable camp we have Jud, who could get stuck counting to three, Benry, who's only interesting characteristic is combining two names used by Michael Emerson's character in Lost (Ben and Henry = Benry), Alina (this season's Coleen/Elizabeth aka girl next door) and Kelly B, the med student with the prosthetic leg who has rocked out so far on challenges. On the other side we have... NaOnka and her irrationally simmering ball of hate. She hates Jud because of his hair and Kelly because of her leg. Maybe all the damage she's done to her brain by tossing it from side to side when she speaks is causing her to lash out uncontrollably and for no apparent reason.
I'm thankful to her for clarifying for me the difference between "hood" and "ghetto." Now it's my turn. There's a difference between a character and a caricature. You are embarrassing yourself and you should pray for a blindside to get you off of the TV before you can do any more harm. And speaking of harm, pushing over a disabled person -- yes, even for a clue that could win you a million dollars -- is something even Johnny Fairplay wouldn't have done. "Hopefully I'll push you so hard your damn leg will fall off." This girl has serious issues, none of which can be addressed on a reality TV show that does not include Dr. Drew.
My question is why is she in an alliance with so many people? What could possibly have caused the other people in her group to say, "she's mean, she's angry, she's nuts, I like her!" I want to see her torch snuffed stat!
But here's the problem for the viewer. Without her, the young camp would be deadly dull. It's the third episode and I resorted to Wikipedia to get the names of the two strapping male contestants on the team (interestingly, the editors had the same problem because they listed them as boring light haired guy and vacuous dark haired guy. Well, that helps clear that up!) I vaguely remember the dark haired guy came up with this brilliant minority alilance because the smaller the alliance the better, or something liket that -- or maybe I don't understand the concept of minority.
Thanks to tackling the handicapped girl and smashing the fruit in the process, NaOnka has a clue to the Hidden Immunity Idol that she can't figure out -- so she shows it to Brenda. I hope Brenda proves smarter than our ER Doctor and does not give NaOnka the answer (the way Jill gave it to Marty last week. That sounded a lot more interesting than it was). Someone, please play strategically. It's right there in the intro, outwit. Use your brain, people. No more sharing clues and sharing immunity idols. The Care Bears were wrong.
After last week's explosive tribal council, this week was due to be a bit of a letdown and it was. Maybe next week Holly will steal Jimmy T's necklace or Dan's hair gel or NaOnka will shake her head so violently it'll pop off or Kelly B will tire of NaOnka's attitude and pummel her with her leg. If not, at least let there be a reward challenge. I miss hearing Jeff say, "Wanna know what you're playing for?"